The Chosen

About a minute ago I finished reading The Chosen by Chaim (pronounced Hhhime, with a little bit of phlegm) Potok.  It was a truly remarkable and amazing book.  I would have to say that it has to rank as one of my all-time favorite books.  I really loved it.  The ending was so thick and juicy with pathos.  I really can't say enough about how much I enjoyed reading it.

I have always been fascinated with Judaism.  Not only did I learn a great deal about the end of World War II and the creation of the Israeli state, but I learned a lot about Talmud and Hasidism.  I used to joke around and say that if I wasn't a Christian (specifically, a Mormon), I would probably be Buddhist.  But, to be honest, I think I would rather be a Jew than a Buddhist.  There is just something deep within me that identifies with Judaism.  It's hard to describe.  I love their devotion and faith.  I really admire orthodox Jews.  They live their religion so much more fully than I live mine.  I say that to my own shame.  I aspire to be more like the character Reuven, and his father, in the book.  They do a good job of straddling the line between being totally devout, and yet allowing themselves to live in the world.  Reuven's best friend, Danny, is a Hasidic Jew, and his father is so strict that it nearly suffocates Danny to death.  I always knew Hasidism was strict, but I never realized just how hard-core they are until I read this book.

Anyway.  If you ever need a good book to read, I suggest you pick this one up and give it a try.  It might bore you in some places (although I was never bored, I can see why others might be), but I think you will find that the ending makes it all worth it.  At least, it certainly did for me.

This is the second book I have read by Chaim Potok.  The other one was about 7 or 8 years ago, when I was going to BYU.  It was My Name is Asher Lev.  That is also a really good book.  I think I will try to read all of Potok's novels.  They don't have any smut in them, and they are really fascinating, well-written, aesthetically beautiful works of fiction.

Lala

I just discovered something kind of cool.  There is a fairly new website out there called Lala.  It is a music streaming and/or purchasing website.  You can find and stream over 7 million songs on there for free.  I like that.  It's a good way to discover new music. The unique thing about Lala is that you can upload your personal music catalog (like, from your iTunes library) and listen to it from ANY computer that has access to the internet.  Kind of a cool idea.  Like I said, it's free to use, but there are some things that you can choose to pay for (like, you can buy mp3 songs for 89 cents, and stuff like that).  Anyway.  I just thought it was kind of cool - and figured I'd share.  I don't know if it will catch on and become a huge internet phenomenon, but it just might be the next big thing.  I guess we'll just have to wait and see.  In the meantime, have a listen to Phoenix's 1901, courtesy of Lala.

Chewbacca costume!

My friend Mike Sloan posted this on facebook, and I thought it was so funny that I would re-post it here. This is a REAL Craigslist ad. Enjoy.

Bells and Whistles

For those of you out there who also blog regularly with Blogger, you might be interested in these recent developments.  The first one is the "Read More" function.  I have seen this on many other blog services (such as Live Journal, Wordpress, etc.), but always lamented the fact that Blogger didn't have the option available.  Well, now it does, but you probably have to do a little tweaking to get it to work.  Are you intrigued?  Then, by all means, don't stop reading now.

Read more »

Big Mouth

Today I went in to the apartment office to ask why I received a 50 dollar fine, because they didn't specify what it was for. Before going in I actually committed to myself that I would discuss the issue with a cool head, and not get angry.

Epic fail. Although I did start out being calm and collected, I quickly became angry because I felt like I was being treated unfairly. I'm not one to argue with a punishment that I feel is deserved, but I do take exception to capricious ones that are doled out seemingly at random.

We've lived in this apartment for three years now, and suddenly the management deems it necessary to fine everyone who doesn't have renter's insurance. Now, I know that the contract specified that we are supposed to have renter's insurance, but in the three years we've lived here without it no-one has said a word about it. I'm not opposed to having renter's insurance. In fact, I think it's a great idea. I just kept forgetting to get around to setting it up.

Anyway. The point of this post isn't to vent about my frustration with my apartment complex's management as much as it is to give voice to my frustration with myself for losing my temper. I didn't yell or swear or anything, but I was angry and hostile toward the woman working at the office, and I feel bad about that. It isn't her fault that the owners create stupid policies and she has to enforce them. She was actually pretty cool about the whole thing and apologized for the fact that the owners are being jerks by having these arbitrary fines for stupid, minor infractions of the rules. I guess I just feel bad because I'm sure she gets crap from tenants all of the time, as well as from the owners, and is just stuck in the middle. That can't be a very pleasant position to be in.

On my facebook status I posted the following scripture, because I feel like it really applies to me. It is from Proverbs chapter 29 verse 11: "A fool uttereth all his mind: but a wise man keepeth it in till afterwards." That's my new favorite scripture. I get myself in so many bad situations by shooting off my big mouth, and my life would be a whole lot simpler if I just learned to keep my thoughts to myself when I'm tempted to say something unkind, blunt, sarcastic, or rude. So. That's my goal for the near future: to leave things unsaid that ought not to be spoken. And that goes for writing as well (which is usually the bigger temptation for me, because it is even easier to distance yourself from the situation when you are writing than when you are actually speaking with someone - making it just that much easier to be unkind and/or brutally honest).

p.s. I just read a really good article called "The Mormon Ethic of Civility" that I find is particularly relevant to the theme of this post, so I thought I would share it. It actually comes from the LDS Church Newsroom, and I noticed it because of the neat little widget I have on my blog (yes!). I highly recommend it if you have a few minutes.

I'm Weird

So, I'm weird. I think that fact is pretty well established by this point in time. But, here's my latest reason for being weird. I have these diametrically opposed desires at the same time, which cause a fair amount of discomfort and confusion. You might wonder what the heck I'm talking about. Well, I'll try to explain. Today I went to the ward talent show. As many of you know, I have participated in several talent shows in the past, and based on the feedback I've gotten, I didn't do too bad of a job. In fact, not to sound arrogant or prideful or anything, but, people really liked my "talent." But, here's the thing. It's not really a talent to just get up in front of everyone and act like a fool, is it? I mean, I guess being funny is a talent, so, I suppose there is some small amount of talent involved. But, mostly it is just being willing to look like a moron and let people laugh at you. That's my biggest talent.

So. Last year my talent show performance took a huge toll on me. It was really hard for me to get psyched up for it, and then it was one of the scariest things I've ever done. I don't think people realize that fact. But, it was hard for me to do it. Really hard. It took almost everything I had. So. While I am flattered and enjoy the compliments that I regularly get about my performance, I don't really have any desire to repeat it any time soon. So, when they announced the talent show a month or so ago, everybody kept pestering me to do another performance. I always shrugged it off, and people were kind of annoyed, because they couldn't figure out why I didn't want to do it.

Anyway. So, I went to the talent show today, with no plan of performing. What I also didn't plan on, unfortunately, was all of the heckling I would get by people who wanted me to perform. Seriously, I think 20 people came up to me and asked me if I was going to perform. When I said "no," they acted disappointed, like I was letting them down personally or something. It was a weird feeling. Part of me liked the attention, but another part of me really disliked it. I have this weird dichotomy in my personality where I dislike being the center of attention, and yet sometimes I purposefully try to place myself in the center and want people's undivided attention. It's weird. One part of me thrives on the attention, and another part of me shrinks from it. So, I have this love/hate relationship with compliments and stuff. Part of me really wants people to make a big deal about me, and another part of me just wants to blend in with the background and not be noticed at all. But, you can't have it both ways, obviously. So, no matter what I do, one part of me will be happy, and one part will be uncomfortable. If I don't get attention, I will feel slighted or underappreciated. But, if I DO get attention, I will feel uncomfortable and awkward.

So. That's just a little peek into my weirdness. I don't really get it. But, suffice it to say that people kept pestering me so much about performing in the talent show that I snuck out the back door and left before it even began (I should probably mention that it didn't even start until like a half-hour after it was supposed to - so there was lots of time for people to try coercing me into performing, despite the fact that I hadn't prepared anything and didn't want to perform). At one point this girl said, "what if we get everyone to start chanting your name over and over? Would you perform something then?" That was the last straw, because I was seriously afraid of something like that happening, and I didn't want the attention. I guess I felt like a victim of my own success, or something, because I really didn't want to perform, and yet that's all anyone wanted me to do. I realize that they were just being nice and trying to compliment me, but it made me feel really uncomfortable. So, I guess the attention-avoiding half of my personality won the battle today. Maybe next time the attention-seeking side will emerge victorious. Either way, it seems like a part of me will always be unhappy with the situation. Oh well. I guess that's just part of life. Or something.

Anyway. It's late, and I should get to bed. Good night, internet.

Personality Tests

I love taking personality tests. I don't know why. But, the more random the test questions, the better - especially if the test seems to accurately portray (what I perceive as) my personality. So. In light of that fact, I thought I would share a really cool test called the "Colorquiz." All you do is pick colors based on how you feel when you look at them. Then, the quiz analyzes your choices and tells you what your personality is like. My results were really interesting. I would have to say that a lot of them are scarily accurate.

Here they are:

Your Existing Situation
Organized and detail-oriented, he has a very precise and methodical manner. He needs relationships which offer him understanding, respect, and approval.

Your Stress Sources
Vulnerable and impressionable and prone to learning new things. Fantasizes of building a perfect relationship with another full of love, trust, and deep understanding. Needs to know people are sincere as he is far too trusting and fears being used and hurt. Needs to know where he stands in relationships.

Your Restrained Characteristics
Giving more than he is getting back and feeling misunderstood and unappreciated. Feels he is being forced into compromising and even his close relationships leave him feeling emotionally distant.

Is feeling emotionally drained from stressful and tense situations. He is in need of peace and quiet in order to overcome his lack of energy and may become irritable if he does not recover.

Applies tough standards to his potential partner and demands an unrealistic perfection in his sex life.

Current situation is leaving him doubtful and cautious about becoming intimately involved with others.

Your Desired Objective
Is intimidated by the activities going on around him. Conflict and disagreements tend to drain him and therefore he avoids those situations. Often-times he will hide his plans and goals from others, because he fears they will openly attack him. He works out his plans in private so as not to cause any problems or trouble with others.

Your Actual Problem
Finds himself too trusting and needs protection from this because he feels people will take advantage or misunderstand him. He hides his true feelings by being highly critical and distant, unwilling to participate unless he knows the intent is honest.

Your Actual Problem #2
Must protect himself from outside influences or he risks losing his independence and having restrictions placed on him. He wishes to be left alone.

Phantom of the Opera: Love Never Dies

I just found out about something pretty awesome: Andrew Lloyd Webber is producing a musical sequel to Phantom of the Opera. How cool is that? Seriously. I'm excited to hear the full score. I'm not sure when it will be released in London or on Broadway, but it's going to be pretty awesome. If you want to hear a short interview with a couple of musical teasers, click here. The transcript of the interview can be found here.



*edit* I just discovered the official website for the production, which apparently opened TODAY in London, and will open next month on Broadway. Yes! Definitely check out the official site for more information!

Return to the Giant Pool of Money

I just listened to the podcast of This American Life with the above title. It was fascinating. They explained exactly how the global economic melt-down occurred in such a way that even a math-retard like myself could understand it. I highly recommend this program. I think every person in America should listen to it. What I like the most about it is that they don't really vilify specific people or institutions so much as they just attempt to explain what happened, and why. They highlight the dishonesty and greed that made it all possible, but also explain it in such a way that makes those involved seem much less like villains and more like regular human beings who got caught up in something much larger than themselves. That's what I love the most about This American Life. They always balance their "reporting" (for lack of a better word) so that you see both sides of a given issue. It's really great. Check it out: http://www.thisamericanlife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?sched=1318

Lightning Reaction Revenge

I just got this game in the mail today. It's HILARIOUS. I'm really excited to play it.